Tag: covid-19

Ambiguity

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

Anyone else besides me feel like they’re swimming in ambiguity? There is a lot of unknown right now. As we get closer to the fall season and kick off our 6th month of hanging out at home, many things feel as uncertain as they were at the start.

We don’t know how long we’ll need to continue our physical distancing. We don’t know what the school year will look like or how it will work. We don’t even know what sports schedules will be!

Not knowing can be scary, but we don’t have to act out of fear.

We can choose to control what’s in our control. Here’s a few ways I’m approaching it. As for the distancing piece, I’m still scheduling virtual calls into the future. If instead we can meet in person and hug for a really long time, great! If not, I can control how connected I’m going to be.

As for school, I know that learning is going to happen and the most likely path includes an element of virtual learning. That was a challenge this spring, but we learned a lot and can adjust this fall as a result. I’m also working to create a little dedicated space for both my kids so that they can do their best work. I can’t wave my magic wand and build out a ton more space, but I can be smarter about where they are situated as well as how I schedule my days.

For sports… I’ve got nothing. We are instead using the time we would have spent spectating and doing other activities. We are making up our own holidays (a belated Merry Half Christmas to you all!). We are reading long books aloud as a family. We are singing and dancing to music. Basically, we’re making up our own fun.

Much as I would like to know exactly what’s next, I can’t see into the future. Both those facts were true BEFORE the pandemic started. So I’m choosing to control what little I can and let the rest go. What about you?

#PositiveAction Write down one thing that’s driving you crazy to not know. Then let it go in whatever way feels most satisfying.

Some ideas: Recycle it. Shred it. Burn it (safely!). Wrap it in duct tape. Glue it so it can never be opened again (can you tell I've been getting school supplies in order?!?). Bonus points for sharing what you did with me!  

 

Image by Arek Socha from Pixabay

Successful Failure

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

We’ve finally made it to the homeschool home stretch. It’s our last week. We did it. I can honestly say I’ve never been so happy for summer break before! In fact, last year at this time, I was worrying about how to balance my work and client commitments with my kids home from school for 3 whole months (different year, completely different perspective…).

Although our homeschool adventure is over (at least for now), I wouldn’t necessarily say it was an overwhelming success. We did what we needed to by focusing mostly on the minimum requirements. It wasn’t always pretty. It wasn’t without crying (by both the kids AND me). But it’s done.

I will not be winning any awards for this work. In fact, I don’t even think I’d win top homeschool teacher in our house! So let’s just move on, shall we?

Work can be like that sometimes. We give it our all, but it doesn’t end up being a success. We aren’t in the running for any awards or even a thank you from co-workers.

Sometimes, that’s because the work didn’t play to our strengths. Sometimes it’s circumstances outside our control (anyone ever built awesome software only to have it decommissioned a few months later when the company gets bought out? Or was that just me?). It’s the amazing report we share with the executive team, only to have it shelved for another time, which is usually code for NEVER! It’s the product we release with much fanfare… only to hear crickets chirping in response.

I learned a lot from my homeschool experience, similar to the times when I failed at work. The learnings can be awful, brutal, excruciating even, but they teach us as well (or better sometimes) than our success stories. Here’s the three things that I was reminded of during this experience. Sidebar, have you noticed that sometimes you’re re-learning a lesson you thought you knew?  Apparently, I needed to be re-reminded of these lessons in a new context.

  1. Doing work aligned with your strengths is critical – there are roughly a kajillion reasons why I didn’t consider majoring in elementary education in college, but primarily because it’s not something I’m interested in or particularly skilled at. This homeschool experience reminded me yet again just how tough and misery-inducing work can be when it doesn’t align to your strengths. If that’s you right now at work, I’m sorry. It sucks. Know that your strengths are valuable, even if your present work conditions don’t see the value. And look for any opportunity you can to do work more aligned with your strengths.
  2. The learning curve is steep AND stressful – this is true for the things you’re excited to learn, but I found the curve to be steeper and WAY more stressful since it was a topic I wasn’t particularly keen on learning. I needed to step up my selfcare game significantly to help with the stress (running, using the familiar to find comfort, old things, etc.) in order to make it through. If you’re about to make a job change, plan ahead and know that you’re going to need more time for stress management.
  3. Always find something to celebrate – making it through to Friday felt like a major accomplishment most weeks and was worth celebrating. Pizza for dinner! There were enough other issues going on that we needed to find any win, no matter how small since it often felt disorganized and downright ugly, but hey, progress was the goal, not perfection. We’d ask what was working for the kids and try to lean into those things. We got VERY creative with schedules and tried things even if we didn’t think they’d work (because nothing could be worse than the first week!). If you’re on a tough project at work right now, the thing your team could use most is some celebration, no matter how seemingly small the win is. Those small celebrations make a big difference. If you're having a hard time seeing all the little things that are awesome, then check out The Book of Awesome, which is sure to help you find something to appreciate no matter what!

I have no idea what the future holds, if or when I’ll be expected to homeschool again. I’ll be slightly more ready if there is a next time, but definitely won’t be holding any space on my trophy shelf for one of those homeschooler of the year awards. Better keep these lessons handy just in case!

#PositiveAction If you’re struggling with something at work, think about how you can apply a lesson you’ve already learned to make it better. We can’t always turn failure into success, but we can definitely improve on it!

 

Important Programming Note: With the shift into summer and school letting out for the year, the blog will be changing to new posts every other week instead of weekly. If you are missing your Work Authentically fix, you can get a more regular dose of inspiration when you follow us on LinkedIn, Twitter, and Instagram.

 

Image by AxxLC from Pixabay

Talk to Someone

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

Technology has dramatically changed the job search. You need to consider algorithms, ATS’s (that’s applicant tracking systems for those unfamiliar), your social media posts, and a whole lot of other things that you didn’t have to think about 20 years ago. Even 10 years ago, those things all mattered much less than they do today.

I talk to lots of job seekers that struggle with embracing these technological changes, partly because they prefer a more human approach. If you fall into this camp, I’ve got great news for you: keeping humans at the center of your job search will actually be much more effective than most other strategies!

Well this is surprising (but is it? Is it really?).

We’ve talked before about the importance of being kind, and relationship currency, and not being a grade-A jerk (or any kind of jerk!) when you’re faced with an interruption. Our relationships with others define not just our workplaces, but our entire lives.

So how do we bring our relationships into focus in the context of a job search? The first thing to do is tell everyone you know that you’re in the midst of job search. Some people may not know. Some may not remember, even if you did tell them already. This best done not through a generic post on social media about looking for a job, but rather reaching out to people individually and sharing with them specifically what you’re looking for in your job search.

And when I say everyone you know, I mean everyone! You’ll be surprised at who ends up helping you and who ends up ignoring your request (extend them a little kindness and know they likely have a good reason if they didn’t help). So yes, your former co-workers can be a good starting point, but don’t leave out friends and family, neighbors, acquaintances, and people you know through various community organizations and businesses.

I have a friend that has been looking for a job throughout the pandemic. He has done all the right things from a technology standpoint and has a great resume and LinkedIn profile. He recently was interviewed for one of the positions he applied for online, but the reason he got the call wasn’t because his resume made it through the ATS and was keyword optimized (although it did make it through).

It’s because his neighbor was an employee at the company and looked up the job posting to see who the hiring manager was and then shared it with my friend. My friend wrote a nice, personal message to the hiring manager, which helped him stand out from the over 1,500 (!) people that applied online. On top of that, a former co-worker took the time to write my friend a glowing recommendation and sent it to the hiring manager. These three steps didn't take a ton of extra time, but had a huge impact on the hiring process.

The odds of my friend being one of the handful of people getting a call for an interview are WAY less than the odds of finding one of Willy Wonka’s golden tickets. But my friend beat the odds by adding in something that algorithms can’t properly account for: human relationships.

#PositiveAction Whether you’re looking for a job right now or not, reach out to someone you know that you haven’t talked to in a while. It’s a whole lot easier to start a conversation when you don’t need something!

If you or someone you know is in the midst of the job search right now, I’ve got a short e-book that helps focus on the most important strategies (like talking to humans) to jump start your quest and help you stand out from the crowd. Check out Get Out of Your Pajamas, Take a Shower, and Talk to Someone: Job Searching During a Pandemic, Economic Downturn, Recession, or Other Crisis on Amazon today.

 

 

E-book cover image by Wolf Mountain Publishing

Blog post image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

So Now What?

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

As we all continue to acclimate to what’s being dubbed “the new normal” amidst COVID-19 (and let me go on record to say there’s been very little in my world that has felt remotely normal, but that’s the phrase we’re using anyway!), I find myself frequently asking the question, “So now what?” 

It’s a question that helps me figure out the best next step when I need to move forward, particularly when things I wanted, or counted on, or hoped for didn’t materialize. It keeps me from getting lost in the disappointment of it all.

I’m guessing that for many of us, that feeling of disappointment is a daily or even hourly occurrence.

There are things we hoped to accomplish that just can’t get done due to the people needing our time and attention right now, whether children, spouses, parents, co-workers, clients, and more. There are milestones we’re celebrating in new and different ways, like birthdays, holidays, even graduations. I’m sure the members of the class of 2020 are more than a little disappointed at this turn of events, even with national ceremonies planned. 

So now what? How do we move past that disappointment? Well, it ain’t easy, especially if you have been waiting a long time for a particular milestone. The disappointment doesn’t go away, but with So now what? you don’t get stuck there.

So now what? forces you to think about what else you can do. It shifts your attention to the future, instead of the disappointing past. Now that the thing you didn’t want to have happened has happened, what will you do next?

I’m not advocating that we ignore our emotions. I’m not trying to minimize the disappointment either. I’m advocating for preventing the negativity from taking over (I’ve been there and it’s no fun!).

I recently celebrated my birthday. This is nothing compared to the major milestones that many people are missing out on. The disappointment was there, though. I couldn’t do any of the things I would normally do to celebrate, like go out to eat, watch the Kentucky Derby, hit up a cool thrift shop, and meet up with friends. So now what? I could choose to wallow in my misery and sweatpants… or come up with a new plan.

I picked a meal we could make at home. I went on a hike at a recently re-opened state park nearby. I had some video calls from well-wishers. I tried a new homemade donut recipe and more importantly, I got to pick which plate I ate it on (anyone with younger kids knows how big a deal getting to pick a plate can be!). None of it was my first choice for celebrating, but it was a pretty decent plan B. I chose to have fun.  

So now what? It’s one of those questions I ask my clients frequently, especially when we’re talking about the future. Maybe that job posting closed before you got to apply. Worse yet, maybe you applied and never heard back. Worse still, maybe you interviewed and they loved you… but they decided to go with the other candidate and you’re the solid second choice. So now what? How will you keep moving forward in your job search?

In work and life, not everything goes to plan. In fact, I’m 1,000% confident that the past 2 months haven’t gone entirely the way you hoped or anticipated. So now what?

#PositiveAction Take one disappointing thing that’s happened recently and ask yourself, “So now what?” to find the next best step you can take given your present reality.

 

 

Scarcity (or that time we didn’t run out of TP)

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

You’ve no doubt heard the stories that it’s impossible to get toilet paper. It can’t be done. There’s not a square to spare anywhere! 

That’s what the news stories would have us believe. And stories like that create a scarcity mindset. One of my favorite books on the topic is Scarcity by Mullainathan and Shafir. It’s a fascinating read into the science behind why it’s so hard to break out of procrastination, poor dieting results, even the cycle of poverty.

TLDR version of the book: Scarcity comes from not having enough of something. It could be not enough time. Not enough money. Not enough food. And the lack of something we need causes our brain to work differently, to tunnel, and focus on the lack. It changes our behaviors and often exacerbates the very problem we’re trying to solve.

Those stories about no toilet paper create a sense of scarcity for us. We feel fear around not having enough… and it changes our behavior. I'll show you what I mean.

Our family had run out of TP at the end of February, so I had restocked our supply with a family-sized pack just before the shutdown started and toilet paper became scarce on the shelves. We had enough to get by for a little while.

And yet, those news stories started to get to me. I didn’t notice at first, but eventually I spotted the scarcity mindset when I found myself wondering thoughts like, “Should we be using less TP to conserve our supply?” and “Should we be trying to minimize bathroom use altogether?”

Now, I’m the furthest thing from a doctor (I get faint at the sight of needles!), but I’m pretty sure that if I asked one, they would tell me that avoiding going to the bathroom is not the recommended course of action to maintain a healthy body.

The scarcity mindset had me focused on lack and was starting to get me thinking about changing my behavior! What’s the counter to scarcity? An abundance mindset.

Abundance doesn’t focus on what you lack; it focuses on what you have. It shifts your attention away from the negative and to the positive.

For finding more toilet paper, there are options. Yes, we could check several stores and eventually, I’m sure we’d find some (we did, in case you were worried!). But I also know that if we had called or texted any number of people, a roll or two would have shown up on our doorstep in short order. Heck, there’s even a pizza place near me running a carry-out special right now that includes a free roll of TP with a large pizza!

When I focus on the abundant options, it changes my attitude and my behavior.

Let’s think about scarcity in the business world. There are lots of examples of company policies that create a culture of scarcity. Things like you can’t get promoted until you’ve been in the role for 3 years or maybe you have to have degree X to make it to level Y or how about only a small percentage of people can get a decent sized raise and oh by the way the criteria for achieving said raise is so impossible that no one knows anyone who’s ever gotten it.

Those policies, grounded in scarcity and fear don’t bring out the best in people. They are actually highly demotivating to the majority of workers.

Exceptional companies recognize this. The culture focus shifts from scarcity to abundance. Promoting people who do great work. Recognizing a degree isn’t a guarantee of the quality of work you do. Growing and cultivating leaders at all levels, knowing you can never have enough great people. Finding ways to share the wealth, but more importantly motivating people beyond money with purpose and challenge.

Scarcity cultures bring out bad behaviors in people because people believe the stories that there isn’t enough for everyone. Have you ever worked somewhere with a bunch of competitive, back-stabbing jerks all angling to get ahead? Yup. Me too. It’s no fun and good people will spot the scarcity and move on to more abundant pastures quickly.

#PositiveAction How can you challenge a scarcity belief today? Is there an abundance story that you can start telling to yourself and your team instead?

P.S. What an exciting time we live in where toilet paper and bathroom usage are totally appropriate topics to discuss in the context of work and career! Thanks for reading to the end. 

 

 

 

Image by Alexas_Fotos from Pixabay

Don’t Force It

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

We don’t need to pretend we’re OK when we’re not OK. And right now especially, it’s OK to be not be OK! Most people are struggling. The more honest you are about your struggles, the more comfortable your team will be talking about theirs. Now is not the time for a stiff upper lip; it’s time for empathy and kindness and understanding. In fact, Gallup studied major crises across decades and found that universally, people are looking to their leaders for trust, compassion, stability, and hope.

Being a good leader* can get lost in the shuffle of busy-ness during good times, but it becomes essential during times of challenge and crisis (*Note: I’m using the term leader in the broadest sense – we are all called upon to lead in certain situations, whether with family, a group of friends, or formally at work). Maybe, like many people, you’re stuck in fear and struggling to get to hope. Fear can absolutely stop us in our tracks, but we need to remember a key element.

Fear arises whenever we face something new.

The new can be something exciting that we’ve worked toward for a long time, like getting that degree. It can be something scary that was forced upon us, like social distancing. But fear arises when we face anything new. 

We’ve all heard the adage that you can’t force a square peg in a round hole. And in a world where you’re striving to work authentically, you can’t force yourself to be who you’re not. So what do you do if compassion isn’t your thing, since that’s one thing people universally need in times like these?

Find someone you know who has it as a strength. Ask them to coach you on it in the short term so you can improve. You don’t have to become an expert in compassion; you just need a willingness to show up, ask good questions, and be there for people.

As for me, my efficiency strength is much stronger than empathy. There’s a time and a place for efficiency, but now isn’t necessarily it. At least not without a strong dose of empathy. So I’m asking others and leveraging resources like articles, podcasts, and more to make sure that I’m starting with empathy in my work. Doing less slowly, but doing it with good intent is more important for me right now.

If your strengths naturally guide you toward creating trust, compassion, stability, and hope, awesome! Do that because people need it. And if they don’t, do what you can. Don’t force it. But do keep in mind what we all need during this, and any, crisis.

#PositiveAction How can you create a little bit more trust, compassion, stability, or hope in your corner of the world today?

 

 

 

Image by Andrew Martin from Pixabay

Labels Matter

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

Spring is a time of change and a time of growth. Are you ready to create lasting change at work or in life? Then you won’t want to miss our Change Conqueror virtual workshop in April 15! 

In this era of eating at home more, it got me thinking about labels. They are on all our canned goods and help us identify what’s inside the can. Black beans here. Corn there. Have you ever opened a can without a label? It can be very disappointing to get canned vegetables when you were hoping for spaghetti o’s!

Labels also are used to get us to want things. Marketers know we’re drawn to fancy labels, bright colors, and interesting names. Sometimes, nothing changes about a product except the label and it’s enough to entice us to buy that product. New and improved! 33% more! All natural!

But we don't just give labels to products. Have you thought about the labels we give to people? Or the labels people give to us? When we’re living into our personal brand and showing up at work the way we want to be perceived, it can be positive labels. When we’re under stress, overworked, and experiencing anxiety, we might not show up as our best selves and that makes it more likely that someone else will label us negatively.

Do you know someone who is enthusiastic? When you’re excited about what they’re excited about, it's easy to label them enthusiastic. But… when we’re tired or not interested in their topic, we start to label them as too much, over the top, just so extra. Their enthusiastic behavior doesn’t change, only our perception of it does. One label is positive, the other is negative.

Perseverance is a trait we tend to celebrate in athletic events, but far less so in a business context. Today’s workplace wants adaptable workers, those that can adjust and change quickly as new information is learned. I think we need a balance of perseverance and adaptability, but when adaptability is valued more, we have a tendency to label perseverance negatively: slow, unable to change, stubborn even. 

Has anyone ever been rude to you at work? Yup, me too. Easy to label anyone that is rude as having no manners, a jerk, or worse! But maybe they are under a lot of stress or having a bad day.

We don't limit our labeling to products and people… we do this for situations too. Think about your environment if you're lucky enough to be at home during a global pandemic. Are you labeling your situation as much needed family time? Or forced to cancel plans? Quiet downtime or isolation and loneliness?

The more we tell ourselves a negative label, the more we're going to feel negative toward that person or thing. 

Right now, being in confined spaces whether by ourselves or with others has the potential to bring out our negative labeling more (boring, noisy, undisciplined) and we need to work extra hard to show people compassion and use positive labels (a chance to learn something new, energetic, interested in many topics). It’ll create more harmony in your relationships and make all those things that have been annoying you far less annoying!

The more we tell someone they’re a screw up, the more likely they are to screw up. The more we call someone lazy, the less likely they are to do. The negative labels have a way of bringing out the worst in people, where the positive labels help people live into their strengths. It’s as true for our children as it is for our co-workers. If you’ve got someone that you’ve been labeling in a negative light, maybe it’s time to put a “New and Improved” sticker on your mindset and change to a more positive label! Try it for your current circumstances and see how they transform too!

#PositiveAction What label can you change from negative to positive to transform your experience today?

 

 

 

Image by Annalise Batista from Pixabay

History Helps

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

We talked about combating our fear of the unknown with familiarity. We looked at how changing our expectations and getting creative can help us survive and thrive. Here’s another way to use the familiar as we settle into the “new normal”.

Neil Postman reminds us, “Old things, like clothing or cars, act as living museums that help us to remember. Old things give a sense of continuity and history, which is of great value in today’s culture.”

An old thing at my house that has renewed life right now is my collection of books containing Calvin and Hobbes comics by Bill Watterson. My kids have discovered them on our bookshelf and have been spending hours reading together (including right now, giving me the time and space to write!). Unfamiliar? Start here with the first book or stock up for the next month at home and get the whole set! 

Whenever they start reading one, here's how it goes. It’s quiet for a little while. Then I hear their giggles or full-blown laughter letting me know they’ve found yet another comic strip they enjoy.

I have lots of memories of reading those same books as a child and young adult, with similar effect. Back in those days, we would need to physically go to the bookstore at the mall to get a copy of the latest book. Then, we’d take turns in my family each reading the book from start to finish.

The rule was that you couldn’t ruin the punchline for anyone that hadn’t read the book yet. So we’d wait anxiously until my brother, both my parents, and I had finished so we could talk about our favorites and laugh together at the hijinks that Calvin and Hobbes always managed to create. We spent lots of time re-reading and repeating the best ones to each other!

Now, the pages of the books are yellowed. Some of the covers are bent. All show signs of wear and much use. But they have a legacy of joy that hasn’t faded at all in 30 years.

#PositiveAction Dig up a relic from your past to celebrate and ponder the ideas and artifacts that connect us across time and space.

And speaking of history… Is your work history not what you wish it was? Are you ready to make a change at work or in life? Then you'll definitely want to check out our Change Conqueror virtual workshop. For a limited time (the only time this year, in fact!), you can reserve your spot at a discounted rate! 

 

 

Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Stay-At-Home Survival Guide

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

In case you missed it, I'm hosting a FREE webinar on March 31. I'd love to see you virtually! Now, onto the blog…

 

 

 

Last week, we talked about our fear of the unknown and finding comfort in the familiar. We all need to find a way to deal with what we’re feeling. But for most of us, our everyday lives have been significantly altered, so let’s dive into where the proverbial rubber meets the road. We’re all primarily stuck at home. Now what do we do?!?!

Extroverts are miserable without the crowds and parties that sustain them. Introverts are miserable with their formerly quiet spaces being occupied (sometimes loudly!) by other family members with little means to escape. Ambiverts are miserable because they experience both sides.

Basically, everyone is experiencing some form of unhappiness, so right now, know that others are feeling the same as you. Uncomfortable. Frustrated. Freaking out! There are a lot of intense emotions. And with good reason. Many of us haven’t spent this much uninterrupted time with our spouses in years (or ever!). But honestly, whenever you put any more than one person into a confined space, whether tiny house or McMansion, eventually tensions are going to rise.

What can we do?

  1. Embrace the messiness
  2. Get creative

How do we embrace the messiness? Well, it starts by lowering expectations. You’re not going to be able to get as much work done with your kids home as you would if they weren’t there. You’re also likely not in a position where you have 7 hours free to teach your kids a full day of school following the exact schedule their teacher does. So cut yourself some slack and lean into the messiness. Once we stop expecting things to be like they “used to be” we can embrace where we actually are instead.

Then, it’s time to get creative! This week was supposed to be spring break for my kids. We’re not going anywhere (obviously!), but that doesn’t mean we’re going to be sitting around this week staring at each other!

We wrote down exotic destinations that would be fun to visit and drew one out of a hat yesterday. For the rest of the week, we’re going on a virtual trip to Australia! We’re making paper passports, doing kangaroo crafts, and learning about a place we’ve never been by checking some e-books out of the library. It’s simple, free, can be done from home, and it’s fun. In fact, my kiddos were so excited about it, they packed actual bags this morning to start the virtual trip!

Maybe you’re frazzled from all the change that’s happening now. That absolutely can stifle your creativity. But lucky for you, there’s lots of cool free things available right now that you can just start using! Here’s just a few ideas.

Audible (a division of Amazon) is offering free audiobooks for kids as long as schools are closed. The stories are for kids from preschool age into their teens. Stories are available in six languages.

While the kids are distracted, you can enjoy the sound of silence and catch up on your reading with a free trial of Kindle Unlimited (it’s for 30 days, so hopefully we’ll be past the worst of it by then). And if you don’t know where to start on Kindle Unlimited, my book, Change Authentically is available there! Happy reading!!

Maybe you're missing music and being at concerts right now. I can't help you with being jostled by a crowd and possibly spilled on, but you can listen to a million songs with no ads (and borrow Kindle books for free) with the Amazon Prime Music free trial. Dancing with wild abandon optional.

We’ve been checking in on zoo and aquarium cameras around the country. Just because we’re stuck at home doesn’t mean we can’t still see the world. Check out the exciting action of the turtles at Discovery World! 

We’ve also been getting as much fresh air (no link needed, just open your front door!) as possible. Sometimes all together, Sometimes just the kids. Sometimes with one parent and the kids so the other one has a little time to themselves. Find something that works for you. My Fitbit tells me that last week I was more active than I have been in 2 months, so I guess that’s a positive outcome, even if my productivity was lower. Remember, changing your expectations will make all of this easier!!

Most of us wouldn’t choose our current circumstances… but we CAN choose our response to them.

#PositiveAction Pick one creative excursion you can do from the comfort of your own home this week!

 

 

Image by tookapic from Pixabay

Take Comfort In What Brings You Comfort

Posted on by WorkAuthentically

 

This has been a unique month. Particularly the past few weeks as nearly everything and everyone makes adjustments due to COVID-19. Because it’s a new virus, there’s a lot of unknown, and unknown often triggers the fear response within us.

Fear is a normal, healthy bodily reaction designed to keep us safe, especially in the not-so-distant past when our ancestors were literally face to face with death on the daily. Many of us are several generations removed from a hunter/gatherer, face-deadly-possibilities lifestyle, so the fear reaction becomes less helpful to us.

At its least productive, fear can stop us in our tracks and prevent us from taking action. And as a person who loves positive action so much I literally wrote the book on it, I’m not cool with fear that messes with that.

I find that when I’m facing any unknown, whether trying something simple like a new recipe or something complex like engaging in a full career pivot, it helps to keep as much familiar around me as I can in times of change. Neil Postman reminds us, “Change is tremendously stressful, so control the amount of newness you must face.”

My version of this sentiment is to take comfort in what brings you comfort. When your part of the world seems like it’s in flux, find something that grounds and steadies you. The familiarity of comfortable things can calm the fear when faced with one or many unknowns.

Here’s just a few options:

  • Music – this is one of those wonderful time machines that can immediately transport us to another time and place without ever leaving our homes. I often gravitate toward albums from my youth when there’s a lot of change happening. If you want to shake it up a bit, search out a great cover version of a song you love.
  • Pajamas (or any other comfortable article of clothing) – there are very few bad days that can’t be cured at our house with a pair of pajamas and curling up on the couch to read or watch a movie. Caveat: As a person who works primarily from home, this does not mean PJ's 24×7! Use comfy clothes sparingly so they can still give you the boost when you need it! 
  • Friends – I know we’re supposed to be limiting contact, but let’s use the amazing technologies that are all around us to stay (or get!) connected in new ways. I’ve already seen some really creative uses of online gathering this week!

There are lots of possibilities to choose from! Maybe it's old movies, books, family photo albums, or something else entirely. The important thing is that you embrace whatever creates comfort and familiarity for you (which will likely be different than for me). It won’t be nearly as effective at fighting back the fear if it’s not something that is authentically you!

#PositiveAction Use something familiar and/or comfortable to ease the fear of the unknown as you navigate change!

 

But wait, there's more! Are you looking for help in managing fear as you embark on something new (whether by choice or by chance)? Are you ready to face the unknown confidently? I’m offering a FREE 30-minute webinar on exactly this topic! Learn more and register here!

 

 

 

Image by Jill Wellington from Pixabay